Есть большие сомнения, что вопрос задавался всерьез, но каменты рулят
Russians are very stealthy creatures. Kind of like ninjas. They are probably hiding in your kitchen right now...give yourself up, they will be merciful.
Relax. I'm in Michigan and we heard about it on the news. Many of us are on our way in a convoy of pick-up trucks to help! Stand-by and stay where you are until we get there!
We are bringin' shot-guns and hound-dogs!
I am sitting in the bushes on the banks of Chattahoochie river and waiting for a command to attack. Commies are coming, get ready!!!!
go back to the hole you've been hiding in you should be safe there. [американский вариант: "Зачем ее вообще из гаража выпускают?"]
this is the funniest question i have ever heard
thank you bush for "No child left behind program"
but seriously please don't worry Russians are very compassionates towards mentally challenged.
You should immediately seek refuge. If there is a high school nearby, or any other public building with a bomb shelter, go there immediately. Lock yourself in, and don't come out for at least 30 years until the nuclear debris has had a chance to clear.